Being a middle child, almost had it all except a little brother.
The youngest was dead during infancy about 8 days after struggling in NICU.
Mom said, she looks like me when she was little.
And she is also the only one with different name's initial; Siti Fatimah.
I asked her, why named her so?
She replied, there was this matron, advised mom to gave the late that name.
Rest in peace.
Why do bother to talk about dead sinless people?
Because I've always been dreaming to have a younger brother.
Expecting my sister to get married faster, so that I could have one,
she laughed at me.
"No! Tak nak langkah bendul."
Stunned, what the fish. Langkah bendul apanya,
nak nikah, nikah sahaja, lah. I don't mind.
Since I know, I might be dead before marrying anyone.
Boo! Sound pessimist?
Nope, just facing reality. Had to weigh all possible ends.
"What will happen, happens. What may happen, one could pray for it not to happen."
There, I said it.
Getting back on track relating abyss of gigoloness.
Mior buzzed me over my decision to deactivate twitter account.
Praising himself high thinking he was the first person to realise I was gone.
Alolo, comelnya. (He'd hate me for writing this)
But you asked for it.
hahaha. *sincere laugh*
Abyss of gigolo-ness,
he did come with such phrase. Of course I'd like to have him as a brother,
but 'Cinta tak boleh dipaksa' and the hell am I to break his relationship with his significant other.
Err, since my little sister has her own standard about man.
I rest such thought.
On another note, I had this notion since I was young, during hostel life or even university,
senior or sophomore was busy eyeing freshies to make them so called 'Adik Angkat'.
I would went, "Meh! The fish..."
Thinking I had enough drama with my own siblings, the-considerate-generous-sister, every-day-I-nag-brother, half-a-woman-little sister.
Aktiviti beradik-adik angkat is a waste of time.
If I want to dote on anyone, I'd keep them well.
Our 'ship' need no label. As long as we know, we are doing deeds to other humans?
Sebagai saudara seakidah, hablumminannas,
Saudara semakhluk, kena adil.
Though, I shall admit such action can be perceived as being selectively treating people?
Oh, come on!
For once just admit,
you had someone whom you like or adore most.
Haha, he is a human whom grown old beyond his age.
Gigolo? Pray for I would be rich enough to sponsor 'makhluk-makhluk Tuhan di jalan jihad - belajar'.
Tunggu habis bayar hutang.
Hutang kan wajib bayar.
Lapor diri ke KKM Januari nanti, inshaAllah will try to plan and manage money wisely.
Sedekah apa yang patut, jolly some on parent.
And to those whom used to think we went broke since dad is no longer around.
Shame on you?
And thank you for making us ponder about our self value.
LOL. We went broke. Jeez.
Sebab dia (makhluk) tu lupa, rezki ni datang kut duit sahaja mungkin.
abyss of gigoloness.
It depends on how you perceive gigolo?
Hahha, if one were to define what a gigolo is, a noun.
I might be stoned to death to try to argue about their stance,
there is always a but.
My intention is to sponsor people whom want to study.
Not exploiting any in sexual term.
We do know, mind could go dull due to money constraint.
Been there, felt that, embrace that, hate that.
Hate being broke.
(read: I don't want to ask money from parent, will survive from what I have."
Jaga Diri, Jaga Iman, Jaga Niat Nak Belanja Wang ke Mana?
:: Salam Satu Aqidah! ::
p/s: are you not entertained? Hahaha ;)