Memories: How to Forget and Forgive Self

Assalam and greetings,

It was a situation accidental death 

sudden one.

A babe of mine once mentioned how she felt,

how to cope with such abundance of feelings.

...

It was a death of a random frog at her house car porch

Accidentally rolled over an anonymous animal.

A frog to begin with.

Does life of a frog matter?

Would it worth it to lament over such incident?

What she did to such pity small animal, is it a sin for a believer?

If not a sin, would and could she kept rolling over frog or whatever insect at her house yards?

So I told her not to give a rat's arse about a dead animal, let alone a person...

To stand corrected,

Provided that she does not have any memories with the dead entity.

Asked her,

"DO YOU EVER HAVE ANY MEMORIES WITH THAT FROG?"

She laughed hard,

more to shrillig like a banshee right after she was about to feel sad and guilty.

"Twas a good hypothesis to play around."

All of us must have had lost some or too many one's we love.

But this story is on a death of a frog.

For a knocking over a person, it's another different coping mechanism.

Maybe we'll go deep soon.

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Heh, siapa nak Ayat balik ???

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I Think, Therefore I Am

Assalam and greetings,

That's how I usually start an email to anyone.

It has been ages since I updated anything.

Almost 5 years, if it were a boy; he would be running headless in a hypothetical house

living life as a kid.

So if I could choose an age to retain eternally; being 5 or a 6 years old is an option.

There were memories,

Some are still there, most were erased.

Mind is an intriguing 'place'.

Easily fabricated.

My narrative may not be the same as other humans if we were to experience a same event.

We chose to perceive what;

One ought to deny what one perceive as it shall defy what one chose to believe.

Do we really have to bother what others are/were thinking of us?

Does their opinions matter? 

Do people's perception shall affect your life in any bit?

Would you die for not pleasing others?

Did you live your life accordingly as if it is relevant for public back slash?

Does your action has taken a negative effect on surrounding?

Are you happy?

What is happiness? Do all human deserve it?

How to not entertain idiocy without affecting your sanity?

I think too much of what if this and that.

I thought I could achieve this without sacrificing that.

I thought I would be strong; to never fall and keep walking (even the path made me drag my feet).

I am stretchable, limit is what set by my less reliable mind.

I have reach my limit;

A band that bound to snap.

Time to recoil and take a break.

If life is a race, I am a rabbit napping under a tree now.

I need that.

Stay on top. 

This too shall pass, Yy.

p/s: Ask for an easier path, being strong simply means the greater the hurdles.

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Heh, siapa nak Ayat balik ???

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Personal Satisfaction

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.

When I used to have odd bantering over random issues with dad,

when we were on good term.

Hahah.

When I was too lazy to argue anymore,

"It's personal satisfaction, dad."

There he stopped bantering... till he continued again on another issues and till I responded with same answer.

Why did he paint his house the same color as his fence?

Such view tend to look odd.

Or I ought to answer him with ' people's personal satisfaction' when I can't answer his logic-illogical queries.

Not all question got answers, ey? But that reason is the easiest one.

And we can't turn back time. Missing him every now and then.

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Heh, siapa nak Ayat balik ???

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